We know them, we hate them, we love them, we date them, and whatever else comes after that (hopefully it was worth it)
Whether you’re a girl or a boy yourself, you know some boys. You know some nice ones and some not so nice ones. And like the fortunate person I am, I’ve only ever been with the not so nice ones *cue smallest violin music*
“YOU’VE NEVER HAD A BOYFRIEND?!”
No, I haven’t. There has not been a guy to ask me to be his girlfriend. So why would I write a post about boys when I have barely had my fair share with them? I’m not too sure either but we’re gonna roll with it okay?
So, let’s back track and then I’ll get to the reason you’re probably here
To all my girls who can relate, let me tell you, IT. SUCKS. And not like the “oh woe is me, I just neeeeeed a boyfriend!” kind of suck but more like “I’m 21… what’s the deal?” kind of suck. Being that girl who can’t relate to her friends about their past or current relationships, it just gets old. Just “talking” to someone and having little arguments or even memorable moments is just not the same as an actual boyfriend. I used to get extremely embarrassed about it and I would pretend that I had an “ex” to fit in. It was someone who used me for so many years and it took for me to realize that wasn't what I wanted to have for myself to end it all, and trust me, it wasn't easy.
Boys have liked me and I liked them back because maybe they were "the one" but I’ve recently come to realize that a lot of guys only like you when you’re doing something for them. That could be anything under the sun and you start to think to yourself "am I girlfriend material?" I've been there, I've asked myself this many times. When you realize that what you're doing with and for this guy who only calls you at night and doesn't speak to you when you cross paths on campus or when the deed is done, it's just done, you just know. It hits you like bricks and you want so much better for yourself. You might be doing these things with them to get over a different boy, or to get revenge on someone, or just because you think that they will like you but if you start to get that empty feeling inside yourself and think "am I seriously doing this right now?" then you might be doing the wrong thing.
Looking back to high school, I was the girl who didn’t go to homecoming because she didn’t have a date and I dragged myself to prom single as well. Along with school dates, I’ve never been on an actual date. Never had a Valentine, never went to the amusement park with someone, just ugh….my life is so miserable, right?
If, by some miracle, I start dating someone, I’m going to have a lot of firsts with this person at the old age of 21 which is crazy that we put a number on this kind of stuff! We put an age on something that is out of your control. You cannot make someone date you (and if you can, lmk) but seriously, if I don’t get my first boyfriend until I’m almost 22, that only means I’m gonna get engaged after everyone else and married late and have kids when I’m old!!! I’m an over thinker and a little dramatic & my friends can confirm that I have sarcastically said these things to them but I knew I wasn't joking.
It's crazy that’s what some people think when there is someone out there for you just waiting for you to come around. This person might be feeling the same way you are or they could care less (I think that’s how it goes, right?) about dating someone until the perfect person for them comes around… You.
As someone who is only speaking from experience in this entire post, I can promise you that if you have been or are in this position currently, loving yourself is the most important thing you can do. I am by no means slut-shaming anyone, I am pro-girl all the way but if you are doing this and not loving it, then thats when you need to have a talk with yourself.
Someone who said all of this and more but much, much better is Katy, a YouTuber I've been following for years now and someone I can really relate to. Her video is linked below.
Her Twitter and Instagram are @hellokaty